Since it isn't safe, since the culture isn't safe, since we're constantly in self-defense, we wouldn't even need social roles like Psychologists and Psychiatrists.  We wouldn't even need law, attorney's, the whole insurance, the whole thing falls apart if we felt safe.  I mean the whole thing.  That's such an incredible irony or tragedy really, that the whole thing is kept together by our feelings of unsafeness.

My scientist friends, although I don't know this as an individual, this is heresy, as they listen to me they say you cannot, the biochemistry of the brain is such that you cannot be afraid and love at the same time. I thought, Oh I loved hearing that because intuitively that's what I've understood in play, that I literally, what I find is that I literally cannot be afraid in play and the same time. What I think happens is that if I'm afraid, my body motions are such that they're more angular. My eye sight and frame of reference changes. It closes down so I'm not seeing as fully.  When I'm not seeing as fully, my emotions become jerky. I'm a little more tense about what's going on behind me. If I'm giving those kinds of body motions off, those kinds of motions are picked up by the playmates. They will either, if they are skilled, and they are playmates for example like wolves or special needs kids, what they will do in order to keep everything safe is stay away, or they clamp down on me until I'm not afraid. They will do either one of those things. 

So literally what happens is I'm afraid nobody plays with me. I mean the people I can learn from don't come to me, or they keep me immobile is what they will do, until I can play and my body motions are fluid and my eye sight opens up and all those things happen.

But that literally for me is my way of thinking about what's actually happened to me.  Because for me it all happened first and then I've had to try and think about what does this mean?  How come if I'm afraid, nothing happens?  Now as a playmate, it's my job to include people who are afraid and do it in ways that are safe for them, which is exactly what the wolves do.

The result of that, or a result of that is that in our games, in order to safety to occur we have to have referees, we have to wear equipment, and we have to have chalk lines, and so on. And we have to have all these written rules and everybody's got to read them and understand what they're supposed to do in order for the play to occur. Real play doesn't need any of that stuff.  But since it isn't safe, since the culture isn't safe, since we're constantly in self-defense, we wouldn't even need social roles like Psychologists and Psychiatrists.  We wouldn't even need law, attorney's, the whole insurance, the whole thing falls apart if we felt safe.  I mean the whole thing.  That's such an incredible irony or tragedy really, that the whole thing is kept together by our feelings of unsafeness.